xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
