i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
