I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
