You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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