I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
