I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
