Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
