Rock
Scissors
Fuck
This girl is more easily done than said...
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
