yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
