Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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