At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Just pee around me
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
