Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry rack_em25 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(616): View more from Michigan

His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"

(616): View more from Michigan

He did it well too

Fav 57 9212 1072
share tweet
(434): View more from Virginia

he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him

Fav 63 1793 4048
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(337): View more from Louisiana

Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"

Fav 19 5394 2752
share tweet
(410): View more from Maryland

this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.

Fav 25 4627 1074
share tweet
(512): View more from Texas

He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.

Fav 16 1446 3473
share tweet
(404): View more from Georgia

Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.

Fav 5 4942 1038
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(303): View more from Colorado

Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.

Fav 18 3965 909
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(248): View more from Michigan

I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.

Fav 1 237 109
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(317): View more from Indiana

My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need

Fav 0 102 3
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT