yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize