i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Randomize
