Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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