God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
