Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Im part way to drunk.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
