But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
