Where did you get a picture of my penis
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
