My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I can't turn off my feet"
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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