porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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