Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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