It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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