the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
