She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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