Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Randomize
