You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Send help, water and tortillas.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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