i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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