you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
i think i just lost a toe
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize