Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
