the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize