I wish I could punch you in the face.
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
