she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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