That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You ruined the universe
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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