bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
