How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
