Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i may or may not be watching the land before time
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
