...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
