I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
