seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
