My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
