its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
