Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
