Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
