I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
