Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
