Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
