You just made me feel so damn special
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
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