called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize