So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
