Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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