I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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